Hi, I’m Charles, and this is my blog, such as it is.
This is going to be a bit of an experiment. I’ve been wanting a writing outlet for some time — not because I expect anyone to read it, but because I’m starting to feel the need for the creative exercise. The less creative my job gets (and these things ebb and flow, but right now they’re at a sadly low ebb), the more I feel like I need another outlet. This may suffice, for a time.
I was encouraged to actually start doing it now because the Elder Scrolls Online will soon be out of beta, and I thought it might be fun to keep a diary of the playing experience from my character’s perspective. This would move the whole thing out of the realm of simple gameplay (fun though I expect it will be), and into something more creative. I also have friends/family who’ve enjoyed my recounting of other gaming experiences (in e-mails), and this would be a way to share that with them.
And if, along the way, I feel like expressing other things, then I’ll have a place to do it. Again, I have no expectation that more than one or two people will care. (At most.) But everything I’ve read about writing suggests that you should be writing because you want to write, not because you want to be read. The former you can control, and find fulfillment in; the latter is a result that you cannot control and hence shouldn’t be too worried about. (Unless you want to be published, which this bit of blogging never will be.)
If you find yourself moved to read anything I write here, you have my appreciation and sympathy. And if you’re here soon after I start this, please excuse the WordPress format. This is my first time doing this, and it’s going to take me a while to get it looking anything other than hideous. I’ll try to work that out as soon as possible.
Oh, and the site name, “hamlet13”, refers to Hamlet, Act 1 Scene III, in which Polonius says to his son Laertes,
This above all: to thine own self be true,
And it must follow, as the night the day,
Thou canst not then be false to any man.
I read that, like most people, in high school, and it’s the truest thing I know. Thankfully, the count of Hamlet devotees who buy websites had not exceeded 12 when I purchased the domain.
So, it turns out that I game a lot faster than I write. (Big surprise.) After a month of pretty dedicated gaming, my character Speaker To Animals had gotten so far ahead of what I’d written it seemed pointless to try to keep up, so I reluctantly stopped. In the months since then, though, it’s been bugging me. I still want to do this. So, I’ve spun up a copy of Speaker, gotten him to the point in the game that I stopped writing at before, and now I’m going to try to continue where I left off. On the plus side, the game events are the same (but with fewer bugs), so I’ll be following the same narrative path. On the minus side, I’m not sure doing this in a copy character will have the same… I don’t know… authenticity? Is that too overblown a concept for this silly gameplay diary? I’m worried that I’m going to be haunted by it not being the “real” character. Maybe if I think of it at an alternate universe version of the same guy. That’s a mental trick that might work for me. I’ll give it shot, at least, and see how it goes. Again, if you’re bothering to read any of this, you have my appreciation and sympathy. -C